…so I walk out of the changing room at the gym and head towards the treadmill and I ask myself, ‘why the fuck would someone wear upholstery cloth on their head?' 'Like ...who does that?'
This is an all girls gym. Ladies only. Notices are posted on the door if any men are going to be present. Why is that thing on your head anyway? Like are you cocooning until you metamorphosize into a butterfly young mohammed?
I can’t help but roll my eyes. Friggen upholstery cloth. ‘God please,' I lament. Where in the Koran does it tell you that you need to dress like this? …I try to convince myself to be patient. …they just haven’t learned that they don’t need to dress like that. I really should talk to them and ask why? …but I haven’t yet. I look to my left and see the only available treadmill is next to a very dark skinned round faced girl; also with a head covering but also wearing an orange shiny skirt (like slip material) overtop of leggings. The only skin showing is her hands and face.
She has no style, or fashion sense, or anti-perspirant obviously. Hi. Ya. You. Nice skirt. I roll my eyes again. God. Why? My mind is blank. I am at a loss. Can’t she see what I am wearing? Does she think I look bad? I’m not the only one in the gym who dresses like me; leggings and t-shirt and runners; hair in a pony tail, earbuds with music. At least she has that. ….I’m well into my 30+ minute power walk and out of the corner of my eye I catch her beginning to run. Why are you running in that outfit? A skirt? Really? Are you a runner? Or are you just doing it for appearances sake? Because I’m going to go full on judgemental right now and take a big guess that you are doing it for appearances sake, because if you were a runner a. you would have better shoes, b. you would be dressed different, like not a skirt that goes past your knees or a head covering that keeps all the body heat in and c. you wouldn’t be 40 pounds overweight. I get it you need some exercise and the treadmill is a great place to start, but running like that really? Who are you trying to kid? You’re no runner. And you’re definitely no mohammedan. You’re wearing the headscarf for show too. Ya ok. You. I know you are. And God knows you are. So maybe spend some time reading the Koran and learning about the religion that you opiate yourself with and then maybe you’ll figure out that you really aren’t REQUIRED to wear the headscarf, or the veil, or the burka or the jalaba, or the friggen upholstery cloth. The only requirement when it comes to dress is modesty. Different meaning to different people but in English it is unassuming; avoiding indecency, where attention is not drawn to one’s self. Hello! Take off the damn headscarf, wear a ball cap, a sun hat, a fedora, a hoodie with the hood up, a doo-rag or a toque; this is Canada. If you want to keep your head covered, keep your head covered, but for the love of God, if you are going to an all girls gym and run on the treadmill, it’s okay for you to wear a tank top and put your hair in a pony tail!
Modesty is defined by our cultural group. And if we are to believe that the word of God was meant to be applicable to all people through time then we must understand that the fundamentals are far more important than the cultural and paternalistic interpretations that are issued by any religious council and dogmatized through imamship..
